OMFG A POST ABOUT SPORTS

What? On this site? A post about sports? Absolutely unconscionable, especially considering we haven’t done so in over two months. No matter, the sports world didn’t stop for us (though it certainly slowed to a crawl), so we must do some catchup. Or, we could do no catchup at all and just kind of jump in as if we never took a preposterously long hiatus. Yeah, the second option sounds better to me too.

The top baseball story, both imaginary and real-word, of the summer has been the Rev. Dr. Stephen

Strasburg Esq. His meteoric rise to stardom in the minors, the hype machine that seemingly knew no bounds, his epic debut (14 Ks in 7 innings), his continued stellar performance, then the injuries.

Strasburg in civvies

At first, it was a stiff shoulder that the Nationals decided was reason enough to shelve him on the 15-day DL. By now, you know where this story ends: He’s on the sidelines for at least a year after undergoing Tommy John surgery to inevitably destroy baseball. He’s pretty much the American Francisco Liriano in every way. Let’s pray Bryce Harper doesn’t have knee/back issues, but let’s be honest, he probably will.

Strasburg was an incredible fantasy asset while on my team, notching a low ERA and well over a strikeout an inning, even accumulating more wins than I expected (he does pitch for the Nationals, you know). Not only does he lose all value this season (and might cost me some cash, as I’m stuck in fourth place), but also loses all his keeper value in leagues where owners didn’t drunkenly drop $26 on him on the auction. So in a way, I’m totally vindicated for that.

Perhaps the saddest part of the whole story is how he had singlehandedly resuscitated baseball in D.C., even for a short while. I never got to see him live, but I would have paid a hefty ass fee to see his debut. He sold out every away game he pitched, even in current baseball wastelands like Pittsburgh, Miami and Houston, and made the Nationals relevant. Hopefully he can come back to somewhere close to the same level to team with Harper and the Zimmerman(n)s to make the Nationals a quality team before too long. This city deserves a good team that doesn’t play hockey.

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